When your food values clash with family members or close friends, the key is to stay flexible and understand their perspective. Most conflicts can be navigated without drama.

Why It Matters: For the most part, as a parent you have more influence on your child's food habits than others. Grandparents and relatives have less impact because they spend less time with your kids. But when they do have more influence and their food values differ from your own, choosing when and how to address those differences deserves careful thought.

Real-Life Example

My mother-in-law is an amazing cook. When we visit, she prepares elaborate meals and serves dessert every night. At home, we don't have dessert daily, preferring a rotation of fruit night, nothing night, and dessert night.

But because our time with Grandma is so limited, when we're at Grandma's house we follow her dessert rules! Given the limited time we spend with her, it's not worth creating conflict over dessert.

But How Do You Handle Clashes If You Have To?

• Share your goals: Explain your family's food values and why they matter.
• Understand their perspective: Ask about their food habits and what they value.
• Find common ground: Look for areas where you can agree or compromise.
• Choose your battles: Focus on the long-term impact of mealtime habits. If it's minimal, let it go.

Quick Tip

If someone has more influence over your child's eating habits, consider having a conversation about your food values. Approach it with curiosity and an open mind. Avoid trying to change their habits unless necessary.

What’s Next?

Next time you're at a family gathering, think about whether the food conflict is worth addressing. If it is, use a calm and understanding approach to discuss your food values. If not, enjoy the meal and let it go.